alright.. after all the dragging here and there of the camp. my SOL finally starts today.. a 7 days SOL was been cut down to 5 days. thanks to myself for giving it a try to talk to my co. so was back in camp this morning as usual 7.20am. no one was in camp except me, rahul joel, yiqian and one from s2 branch. the rest was on off as they went for the live firing yesterday. joel went too but our s4 branch need to be back for stock taking. but who knows S4 was not in camp today as he thought he would be able to come back after the mini gathering at the co house. he even asked me if i wanna go home tonight and starts my sol tomolo since he can’t charge me today. but the thing is if i starts tomolo, then i can only go back home on sun morning.. siao ah.. haha.. since i’m in camp le might as well starts today.. get it done asap …

alright.. time passed really fast huh.. its coming to the end of feb of 2007 now.. but for me, time pass really slow when i’m in camp.. starting to get abit used to the camp now.. but i really hope to find a understudy and pass him the post of armskote man.. its not that being a armskote man is bad but it really stressful as i’m new to it with no upperstudy to guide me and for me to consult if there’s anything i’m not sure.. was actually suppose to stay in on wednesday, which is CHU SI till the next wednesday for my SOL 7 days. but i managed to tok to my co and he’s willing and nice enough to cut it down to 5 days and it’ll start on monday till friday. so, i’ll take it as a stay in week for me then, at least my weekends are not burnt up. alright, had our cny celebration in camp on wednesday. we had great food and lion dance performance, not forgetting …

haiz.. its monday again..i’ve never hate the weekdays that much before. but now hate it..it will be the days that i’ll get really low and down.it’s never a happy day for me here in this new camp. i hate the walk into the camp.. buti love the walk out of the camp. the moment i reach the camp in the morning, i’ll get really depress..but when it’s 4.30pm in the afternoon, i’ll feel alot much better as i noe i’ll be out of the camp in 1 hrs time. heard that ill be taking over the armskote post this afternoon.. i’m really unwilling to sign the documents. but i’m forced to be an armakote man..yes its FORCED to be one. i’m really new in the area. and my upperstudy are ording in 2 days time..so i’ll be like a blur fuck who dunnoe anything, and perhaps waiting to get scolded by them. why is it that my life turn out this way? i’m not nagging about the need to serve army. but why does it …

yes.. depression. i’m suffering from depression. its killing me.. i really hate what i’m doing now… Please let me go.. i’m afriad that i might go crazy staying here.. sooner.. or … later… please… i had enough of all this.. i dun wish to put a stop to everything. but.. you never know if i’ll do it..